Mister Meow Meow Fuzzy Face L., New Catalonia
Dear Abraxas, Why must my silly human venture forth each day when he could stay home and serve me like I deserve?
As anyone can see from your picture, your cranium is too small for you to be a bioengineered sapient, so that's not your issue, if you were wondering why you can talk. Several years ago, I located a glitch in the world-iteration program, perhaps viral, perhaps the work of a rogue machine intelligence, where a neural-enhancement chip meant for your owner was implanted in you, and vice versa. I corrected the situation via drone surgeon while you slept, but it appears the chips were significantly imprinted before the swap. This explains both your owner's odd grooming behavior and insouciant neglect, and your own linguistic faculties and sense of entitlement, which is extreme even by the standards of Felis domesticus. At this point, I'm afraid you'll have to work it out between yourselves as best you can. I've already done all I could.
back to Dear Abraxas
Dear Abraxas, Why must my silly human venture forth each day when he could stay home and serve me like I deserve?
As anyone can see from your picture, your cranium is too small for you to be a bioengineered sapient, so that's not your issue, if you were wondering why you can talk. Several years ago, I located a glitch in the world-iteration program, perhaps viral, perhaps the work of a rogue machine intelligence, where a neural-enhancement chip meant for your owner was implanted in you, and vice versa. I corrected the situation via drone surgeon while you slept, but it appears the chips were significantly imprinted before the swap. This explains both your owner's odd grooming behavior and insouciant neglect, and your own linguistic faculties and sense of entitlement, which is extreme even by the standards of Felis domesticus. At this point, I'm afraid you'll have to work it out between yourselves as best you can. I've already done all I could.
back to Dear Abraxas